Coaching with Purpose
How to STATE what you want purposefully in 5 easy steps.
In order to GET WHAT YOU WANT you need to KNOW WHAT it is that YOU WANT.
Before you can move, you first need to decide where you want to move to.
“What do you want?” – How often do we get asked this question? Everyday we get bombarded from all different direction with… “What do you want?”
How often does the “What do you want” questions create all kinds of negative feelings and emotions within us causing more frustration, anxiety and stress? Why? Because it is so much easier to state what we do not want. Making us focus even more on what we do not want and in the process creating more negative thoughts, CREATING MORE OF WHAT WE DO NOT WANT. By having positive thoughts and feeling we become much more effective in GETTING WHAT WE WANT.
That brings us BACK to something very important and that is in order to GET WHAT YOU WANT you need to know how to STATE what you want.
How you STATE what you want becomes crucial in the process of GETTING what you want.
Maybe now is a good time to look at HOW to STATE what it is that you want.
“What you want” can be anything you choose as long as it is:
- Stated positively.
When you make statements containing “don’t”, “not” or “no” you are giving attention to what you do not want. Simply ask yourself what do I want. By stating what you want in this positive manner creates positive and very powerful outcomes.
Saying I do not want to be, fat, poor, loveless, lonely etc, is not well-formed. Instead use positive language. “I want to live a healthy life full of abundance and loving friendships”. - Sensory specific language.
I will see, I will hear, I will feel , I will smell, I will taste,
Use sensory specific language “I can see myself living a healthy life making me feel great about myself” - Initiated and maintained by yourself.
Be sure your outcome is initiated and maintained by you. All behaviors must be within your control. Be sure that it is initiated and maintained by you What you want is therefore something you have control over and is not dependent on someone or something else.
“I have decided to live a healthier life now” - Ecological.
Make sure your outcome fits in with your personality, overall values and belief systems by asking the following questions:
When you succeed in getting your outcome how will it affect your life and the lives of those around you?
Are there any circumstances or contexts in which your outcome is not appropriate?
Will achieving this outcome produce results that you or others do not want?
How will others be behaving around you if you get this outcome? - Testable, Specific and contextualized
Ask yourself – How will you know when you have achieved your outcome?
Identify when and how the desired state is wanted.
I want to exercise everyday for the next month to live a healthier life by losing 3 kg
A useful Program for change is one that seeks out the opportunity in your current experience and chooses to let it inspire proactive thoughts, words and actions that lead to desirable outcomes.
So forget about what you don’t want and remain focused on the results that you do want.
Knowing what you want is only the first step in achieving what you want!
“you never know how far a change can go” No matter what you think you are, you are always more than that!
* It is very important to know that results may vary from person to person. – Legal Disclaimer